A Shout out to my first love

My first love in life posted a comment, and I have to give a shout out and a big fat juicy kiss to "K Swift". This was my boyfriend my Sophomore year. He was a Freshman. I robbed the cradle! And he was the best first love in the history of first loves. He is the man that set the bar for the next ones. And sadly, so many men pale in comparison to the memory of a high school boy!

He was on the basketball team and I was a Pom-Pom girl. He used to buy my lunch every day, and he actually bought me some pretty nice gifts like a gold bracelet and a Coach purse. He used to slip little notes in my locker, walk me to class, and we'd talk on the phone for hours. But most important, he was always there for me. I had a pretty troubled childhood, and he and his family were always so supportive. I will always love them and thank them for that, because sometimes I really didn't feel like I had anyone else.

Sadly, his Dad got a promotion and they moved away. But we stayed friends. We even made good on our plan to go to Spelman and Morehouse. I just had to send a big fat juicy kiss to my baby of all babies.

K.E.M. I know who loves me and who always did!

Favorite Songs of Summer 2005

I'm making a mix tape os summer 2005 songs. I just want to know what are everyone's favorite songs of the summer. It doesn't matter what genre they are, as long as they make you want to shake your ass. And it's ok to throw a couple of slow jams in there. Mine are (in no particular order):

1. Touch by Omarion
2. One Thing by Amerie
3. Dontcha by The Pussycat Dolls
4. Let Me Hold You- Omarion and BowWow
5. We Belong Together - Mariah Carey
6. Back Then - Mike Jones
7. Sitting Sideways - Paul Wall
8. Switch - Will Smith (SHUT UP! I like clean rap. Sue me!)
9. Make her Feel Good - Teairra Mari
10. Diamonds - Kanye West
11. Dear Summer - Jay Z
12. Welcome to Jamrock - Julian "Jr. Gong" Marley
13. Motivation- T.I.

What's really hood?

Today's post is dedicated to the hood. Feel free to let me know what you think is really hood. But in the meantime, here's what I've got to say.

1.The Chicago Police stopping my pastor Reverend Senator James Meeks, of the greatest church in the world Salem Baptist Church of Chicago, on his way home from Bible study last Wednesday. Then they drew down on him and told him to get in the fuckin car. When he identified himself as a State Senator the cop said I know who you fucking are, get back in the fucking car! What's really hood is that this happens every day and nothing gets done about it. People don't even want to admit that there is such a thing as racial profiling! Guess they messed with the wrong brother. He's got God, the Mayor, the Senate, and about 30,000 people from the Wild Wild Hundreds and various other hoods in Chicago on his side. Keep your head up Gospel Gangsta!

2.Lil Kim going to jail. Will she make it? Will she catch the beatdown from Big Bertha and her crew? Will her next album be wack? Is she going to be playing her prison bitches like suckas to keep her commisary tight? And who's gonna do her weave? That's hood (and stupid) that you going to jail for some n*ggas who don't love you. Kimberly Jones, the streets don't love nobody. You were caught up in the hype. Now get un-caught up girl. Jail is not the place for princesses.

3. Heat. I know it's hot than a MF. People are wearing shit they have no business rocking. It's disgusting. And can you all just tell a friend, enemy or whatever that soap and water should be used BEFORE deodorant! I keep getting whiffs of underarm as I walk through the streets of the Chi and it's enough to make you pass out!

4. JK Rowling. She's richer than the queen of England now. All from Harry Potter. She was a welfare mom and now she just sold like 8.9 million copies the first 24 hours. GANGSTA!

Alright, I'm going to get back to work now. Your turn. What's really hood?

Gossip Folks

Why is it that folks just can't seem to keep my name out of their mouths? I don't have the answer but I have the solution. Fuck em. That's right, I said it. FUCK EM!

OK if you haven't guessed I'm kind of pissy because people have been gossiping about me. Silly stuff. I mean, I really can't trust a soul right now. Girls are jealous and petty and so miserable, especially when they don't have a man! But I guess I better get used to it huh? It's not about to get any better. My book hasn't dropped yet, and it's starting already! All I can say is, BUY MY BOOK! Then talk about me. And spell my name right. Say it right too! May-ta. Thank you.

Anyhoo, I was out this weekend with my friend Godfrey (Soul Plane, Zoolander, 7Up Spokesman) and I asked him if he felt like he got his props here at home or if people were hating. He told some jokes instead of directly answering the question as comedians do, but eventually he got around to sharing. For the most part he gets love. I saw that for myself. I was kind of tripping like hey, don't you see how hot I am? Why are you talking to him? (just kidding...NOT!). Anyway he said in a nutshell, be nice to folks, but limit your circle. No need to roll with a crew. Which is what I already do so I guess I'm on the right track. But then I got to experience it first hand as some chicks in the bar we were in who were desperate for attention starting screaming his name and laughing too loud and saying It's the 7Up guy. It was almost mocking but you could tell they just wanted some attention. Now all they had to do was say hi. But I really respected the way he handled it, which was to ignore it and continue having a good time because they were definitely trying to spoil his fun. Little did they know he's so down to earth and fun they would have gotten the attention they wanted and a free comedy show! Lord knows I sure heard a lot of material and was the inspiration of a few new jokes I'll bet. So that being said I'm going to take his advice, but also I wanted to tell you all to support my boy. He's a brilliant comic who is so slept on so WAKE UP people!!! He's at the Improv in Cleveland now, but if you check his site you can peep his schedule. He is HILARIOUS!!! And ladies, he is really, really, really good looking and SINGLE so it is well worth the price of admission! (But I think I might have a crush on him now so don't make me drag you whores! Funny men are so sexy, and the chiseled chocolate frame doesn't hurt!)

So speaking of sexy, here's the Hot List for this Friday... the topic, SEXY COMICS!!

In no particular order, here are the funny men who make me percolate...

Cedric Yarborough- Reno 911s hottie cop Jones. Umph umph umph. Arrest me officer, I've been very bad.

1. 
   Mike Epps- So simple yet so cute. I'm sure he's quite intelligent in real life though! Top Flight security of the world Craig! The world!

Godfrey- So nice I had to say it twice. Ooh sexual chocolate.

Dave Chapelle- Yes he's skinny. Yes he probably smokes too much weed. And yes he may be a little crazy after the whole South Africa thing. I love him anyway.

Shawn,Marlon, Damon, Keenan and nem Wayans- Beautiful black family. I want to feed Marlon, then molest him. Shawn is so sexy. Damon is fine in the whole father way, and Keenan, ok, maybe not Keenan so much, but I LOVED "A Lowdown Dirty Shame!"

Cedric the Entertainer- he's chubby. I want to pinch his cheeks. You always eat well with a big man.

Will Ferrell - not that cute really, but so funny, he's sexy. He makes me laugh till I cry.

Ben Stiller - Oh God, how cute is Derek Zoolander? He's really really really goodlooking!

For Real Though

OK, I'm gonna really do this blog thing since everyone has one. I've had a blog since 2001 and what you see is all that I've put into it. I'm horrible at this sort of thing. I buy diaries all the time, write in them about my latest love interest, and then when it's over I rip out all the pages and don't even want the book anymore.

Anyway, this a portal into my warped and demented little world. Welcome! Until my website is completed, this is where you can check to find the deal on what’s up with my book, my music, and with me. Please don't take this too seriously. It's just a blog people, OK.

So what’s new in my world…The book is now called The Rollexxx Club and we’re editing right now. Thank God my pages have more white space than red correction marks! Jason, my editor at Warner, is wonderful. He’s not killing my baby, but letting it remain true to the story and to my voice. Awesome.

I took some pictures Sunday for promotion etc. and I’ve come to the realization that I need to stop talking about Bally’s and be at Bally’s. My photographer Rich Markese is awesome by the way. We got some great shots in. But I am used to not having to be retouched which isn’t the case right now. My six pack is a keg, I can't front. But I'm going to change that. But I still like the results, especially my “bad girl” pics (see above) that kind of remind me of Rosario Dawson’s character in Sin City.

Former video girl Karrine “Superhead” Steffans’ book is set to drop. I can’t wait to hear her dirt in her own words. Back when I was modeling in Miami, I used to hear about her exploits ALL the time. I never worked on a video with her though. I hear she’s working on a novel now. I support chicky, but it kind of pisses me off when non-writers decide to write a book and they SUCK! It’s kind of like how “real actors” feel when rappers and singers with no training get starring movie roles. HELLO! Just because you have a story to tell, doesn’t mean you can tell it well. I got my degree in English, I taught English, hell, my day job is 80% writing. I’m not new to this I’m true to this! I wish her and all emerging writers luck, because I’m not a hater. But next summer belongs to me. Oh yes, I’m claiming it, I’m going to have the literary world on lock next summer! Believe that.

All cockiness aside… here’s what’s hot in my world today…

1. Freedom- I am vowing not to have another pitiful boyfriend. So being solo just feels right. Maybe I’ll be free for a while, maybe I’ll get snatched up, but in the meantime, it is wonderful to not be waiting to exhale. We all know what happened to Terry McMillan!
2. Rize. It’s the David LaChappelle documentary about the dance craze crumping. If you don’t know what crumping is, where have you been? It’s tribal. It’s crunk. And fun to do when you’re a lil tipsy.
3. Classic Chicago Deep House. It’s been my music of choice to spin as of lately. I’m working on my mixtape to drop on my birthday, August 16th.
4. Spanish Music. I’ve been feeling La India and Marc Anthony and Celia Cruz. My jams of the weekend were Me Enganates, Contra La Corriente, La Vida es un carnival, and Me Tengo Que Ir. And yes I understand the words!

Peace & Positive Vibes,
M.