Gossip Folks

Why is it that folks just can't seem to keep my name out of their mouths? I don't have the answer but I have the solution. Fuck em. That's right, I said it. FUCK EM!

OK if you haven't guessed I'm kind of pissy because people have been gossiping about me. Silly stuff. I mean, I really can't trust a soul right now. Girls are jealous and petty and so miserable, especially when they don't have a man! But I guess I better get used to it huh? It's not about to get any better. My book hasn't dropped yet, and it's starting already! All I can say is, BUY MY BOOK! Then talk about me. And spell my name right. Say it right too! May-ta. Thank you.

Anyhoo, I was out this weekend with my friend Godfrey (Soul Plane, Zoolander, 7Up Spokesman) and I asked him if he felt like he got his props here at home or if people were hating. He told some jokes instead of directly answering the question as comedians do, but eventually he got around to sharing. For the most part he gets love. I saw that for myself. I was kind of tripping like hey, don't you see how hot I am? Why are you talking to him? (just kidding...NOT!). Anyway he said in a nutshell, be nice to folks, but limit your circle. No need to roll with a crew. Which is what I already do so I guess I'm on the right track. But then I got to experience it first hand as some chicks in the bar we were in who were desperate for attention starting screaming his name and laughing too loud and saying It's the 7Up guy. It was almost mocking but you could tell they just wanted some attention. Now all they had to do was say hi. But I really respected the way he handled it, which was to ignore it and continue having a good time because they were definitely trying to spoil his fun. Little did they know he's so down to earth and fun they would have gotten the attention they wanted and a free comedy show! Lord knows I sure heard a lot of material and was the inspiration of a few new jokes I'll bet. So that being said I'm going to take his advice, but also I wanted to tell you all to support my boy. He's a brilliant comic who is so slept on so WAKE UP people!!! He's at the Improv in Cleveland now, but if you check his site you can peep his schedule. He is HILARIOUS!!! And ladies, he is really, really, really good looking and SINGLE so it is well worth the price of admission! (But I think I might have a crush on him now so don't make me drag you whores! Funny men are so sexy, and the chiseled chocolate frame doesn't hurt!)

So speaking of sexy, here's the Hot List for this Friday... the topic, SEXY COMICS!!

In no particular order, here are the funny men who make me percolate...

Cedric Yarborough- Reno 911s hottie cop Jones. Umph umph umph. Arrest me officer, I've been very bad.

1. 
   Mike Epps- So simple yet so cute. I'm sure he's quite intelligent in real life though! Top Flight security of the world Craig! The world!

Godfrey- So nice I had to say it twice. Ooh sexual chocolate.

Dave Chapelle- Yes he's skinny. Yes he probably smokes too much weed. And yes he may be a little crazy after the whole South Africa thing. I love him anyway.

Shawn,Marlon, Damon, Keenan and nem Wayans- Beautiful black family. I want to feed Marlon, then molest him. Shawn is so sexy. Damon is fine in the whole father way, and Keenan, ok, maybe not Keenan so much, but I LOVED "A Lowdown Dirty Shame!"

Cedric the Entertainer- he's chubby. I want to pinch his cheeks. You always eat well with a big man.

Will Ferrell - not that cute really, but so funny, he's sexy. He makes me laugh till I cry.

Ben Stiller - Oh God, how cute is Derek Zoolander? He's really really really goodlooking!