Remy Ma Shot Her Friend?

So the net is abuzz with the rumors of Remy Ma shooting her friend. I don't think that girl was really her friend. If she was, she wouldn't let Remy rock that horrible weave. I'm just saying. Or maybe the victim was Remy's hair dresser and Remy finally got pissed at her for making her look like a clown.

Now Remy don't shoot me for that.

On the real, no amount of money is worth shooting someone for. Jail isn't cool, fun, or keeping it real, unless you mean real stupid. If someone bothered her son, I'd understand. But the alleged 2-3 stacks that caused the alleged altercation just ain't worth it. Unless she was going to use that money to get her hair done. Let me stop. :P LOL

Ladies, (and men) can we stop the violence and kick the science? Self destruction, ya headed for self-destruction.

M.

OJ, perhaps?

Question: what kind of people buy knives at almost 1 in the morning from ShopAtHomeTV? Channel surfing...ran across the "Bowie Blowout." Who needs 228 Bowie knives? Really now.

And who orders the "Who's Your Daddy Liquidation" 217-piece knife collection? They said I could understand why it's called the "Who's Your Daddy Liquidation", but I really don't. When i think "who's your Daddy", trust, knives are the farthest thang from my dirty mind.

And who the fuck needs an autographed Dale Earnheart(sp?) knife? Uh, wasn't he a NASCAR driver? (Isn't that further proof that you gotta be VERY wary of people who drive 500 miles...IN A FRICKIN CIRCLE! And the fools who watch it. I mean honestly, you could go to the park or cruise strip on a summer nightand see folks drive in a circle! And you could get a hot dog and possibly a number from a guy not rockin' a mullet while you're at it. I'm just sayin'!)

OK and is it legal to sell a 12 pound sword? No really, this shit is a fucking SWORD! Engarde! I challenge you to a dual! And the handle is made in the shape of the White House, and the shaft of the sword is embossed with the Washington Monument and the initials DC. There's a Marine Core sword too (right, like Marines need more knives!).

I swear, I couldn't make this shit up. I'm not under the influence, unless you count peach Arbor Mist (and for the record I don't count it, it's like 12 Proof), so my mind ain't playin tricks on me. These ain't steak knives. These are shank yo baby daddy knives! Hmmmm......there's a thought.

Anyhoo, At the risk of catching a case, I'm gonna lock my credit card away and pretend my phone is disconnected so that I don't do something I may regret later. But these folks are really pushing the knives. And I am a shopoholic.

But fur reel dough, who orders the effen knives? Who do they really think is buying this? (Oh no, serial killers don't buy our knives, just all the other knives.) Granted 217 knives for $299.97 is very cheap, and the 3 pay option of $99.99 is great. (Hey I love a sale) AND There are 30 sheaths that you get for absolutely free! And I'm hearing about all kinds of shivs I never knew existed, like silver bullets and silent shadows. (Uh sure, these knives are for hunting. Right. Sound like baby daddy killas to me!) $1.38 per shank, with "miracle edges" really must be a good deal. And to think, I thought I had the real scoop and was on some old McGuyver shit because I know how to make a shank with a toothbrush, saran wrap and a lighter. (Trust... if some shit goes down, you want me on your team. Don't let the pretty face fool ya! South Side! Wild Wild Hundreds represent!) But I feel like...ooh there's a Navy Seal knife! Sorry got a little distracted. I feel like, this is not just disturbing, but dangerous.

Wait a fucking minute. Fools can sell shanks on tv, but I can't carry my MAC foundation and Motions conditioner on the plane? Amerikkka is sooooooooo FUCKED UP! Priorities gubment...PRIORITIES! Make up and beauty products=good. Knives at a volume discount=mass homicide. You do the math Bush, you do the math. Oh wait, I forgot you can't count. Or read. Or speak coherently. Nevermind!

Oh look, 40 inch swords! Take that all you dudes who think you're packing! 40 INCHES! That's hung!

You Don't Know Me!

You know, there's a lot of people talking trash about me on the internet these days...Folks think they can judge this book by it's cover but they can't. You've got to open up the book and read a little more than the first few pages when it comes to me. And I make no apologies for not being shallow! You can't even begin to know me at first glance.

There's more to me than meets the eye. But what's wrong with what meets the eye? So what I was in videos! SO WHAT! All I've ever done in a video is dance with a glass of champagne in my hand, play around in a pool, or dance with a rapper. No those appearances aren't going to change the world, but they are not going to destroy the world either! I didn't single handedly destroy hip-hop! I did not feel degraded doing videos, and I know what degredation feels like. And I didn't get a credit card run up my butt crack. I didn't get doused with champagne. I didn't make my booty clap. I got paid to get cute, and look like I was having fun. And it was fun. And I never slept with any man from a set, so WHAT, I say again! WHAT?!

So what I swung around a pole. SO WHAT! I don't anymore. And there are a lot worse things to do in this world. At least it was legal. At least men weren't touching me, because I didn't play that. At least your tax dollars weren't going in my pocket via welfare! At least I paid taxes and contributed to society! And I was never a ho. I was greedy. I got caught up in the lure of fast, legal cash. So are lots of people. No it wasn't right. No I'm not proud of it. But you can't unscramble eggs and I made peace with God so...WHAT?! I got frustrated with having a degree and going on hundreds of interviews only to be told I was too qualified or not qualified or not even given an interview. Folks act like jobs are growing on trees ripe for the picking if you get a degree. Don't believe the hype! You all know how much a house is, how much rent is, how much GAS is! And I turned a big negative in my life into a positive. Once again, I offer NO APOLOGIES! I turned lemons into lemonade, daquiris, margaritas, and lemon drops. Why you hatin'? If I hadn't taken that particular journey, I wouldn't have this particular book. And this particular book got me a deal, so why you hatin'? I'm happy! I'm glad I wrote The Rolexxx Club. Because I did, I am living my dream, not just sitting around dreaming. Because I did, I have a lasting legacy. Because I did I have a chance to make a difference. Because I did I'm not sitting in a cubicle gaining weight at a phenomenal rate, cursing my existence, kissing the asses of idiots, playing corporate games that I hated and sucked at because I have a heart, dreaming I was back in Miami and crying buckets when it snowed because of my daily 3-4 hour commute...all for a paycheck. A paycheck that seemed to stretch less even when it got bigger! Still I worked my way up the corporate ladder and then was able to branch out on my own. After videos, after dancing, after modeling, my world didn't stop. Because I wrote this book I don't feel like I sold my soul. Because I wrote it, I'm getting glowing reviews from Book List, from Amazon, from entertainers, from fellow writers. So I ask again, why are you hating?

I am aware that not all videos portray African American women in a postive light, but by chastising the models, you are putting the cart before the horse. We need to talk to models, rappers, and the industry execs and listen, not talk at them. People don't respond well when you tell them what they have to do before you even ask. Lets give folks basic respect, even to those that seemingly disrespect themselves. Why? Why not? If you want to be a role model, why not show people how to always give and command respect. Showing respect to others at all times reflects self-respect. I'm not perfect in this, but I am working on it. All you foul mouthed folks who just want to bast me should try the same.

Say today, that every video model had an epiphany and decided to stop working in rap videos. Tomorrow by sun-up a fresh new crop would be lined up at casting agents across the U.S. And they'd be younger and more naive and would do more for less money. And the videos would still be there. But say, you got an industry exec to expand his or her vision, preferably at BET or MTV or at the top level at a record lablel. Say you got them to sign artists based on talent not just gimmick. Or say that for every gangster rapper signed and promoted, two different kinds of artists were signed and promoted just as heavily and given as much attention, then maybe things would change.

Or maybe, three projects that I'm working on will take off and truly make a difference.

The first is called the Magdalene Foundation. It is a non-profit, of whic I am the CEO whose mission is to provide support and resources for at risk women and girls. Named after my favorite Biblical character Mary Magdelene, I want to reach out to misunderstood women. Mary was assumed to be a prostitute, but she WASN'T! See this link for more info: http://www.magdalene.org/intro.php.

Anyhoo, two of my programs are: Getting Out the Game, helping women employed in the sex industry find a way out, and Knock That Hustle, aimed at helping women involved in the drug trade to change their lives and stop contributing to the destruction that drugs cause. Both programs focus on prevention as well.

Our music is filled with sex and drugs, but that isn't the best way to live. Still you can enjoy hip-hop, and life in general and have fun without degrading women and without slanging dope. And you can still be sexy and smart. You can still talk about adult themes without pushing the message to children. Grown-ups can be responsible, and still grown and sexy.

I believe that changing the images of women in hip-hop is like pruning a beautiful rose garden. You don't chop down the bush to get rid of the weeds. And you don't pull the weeds and leave the roots in the ground. You've got to start below the surface which is the record companies. No not even the rappers, but the record companies. It is about changing the images at the source: the distribution channels. Because just like the most effective way to prevent drug smuggling would be to stop things at the border and where they are made, the best way to change something is at it's source. Now I fancy myself a gardener. I'm not going to destroy the roses or try to change them into daffodils. I will let a rose be a rose. But I want prize winning American Beautys. I'm willing to analyze the soil, find out what it needs, and do my part to make the plant grow.

Which leads to my second project, Redbone Productions. My best friend Angela Allen and I are writing and developing film and video projects that portray a range of the African American experience told from the perspective of African American and Latina women. All kinds of African American and Latina women! There will be Color Purple type stuff, and there will be Scarface type of stuff, but all the scripts will explore the different and diverse tracks our lives take. No one book or film or story tells the story for all of us.

And last, there's Dream Press. Soon I will be accpeting submissions for novels and non-fiction by talented African-American and Latino authors. There's room for ALL of us on the bookshelves! So tell your story if you don't like what's out there. Don't just sit and complain about what you don't like.

Last I want to give BIG UPS to Karrine Steffans. I never thought I would say this myself, but I have to give her props for her strength and courage. No matter what her motivations were for writing Confessions, no matter how you feel about her bedroom business, one thing is for certain: she is a strong woman. People have said some very harsh things about me, and I know that she got blasted waaaaaaaaaayyyyyy worse than me, but she seems to be a trooper as am I. It can be a bit frustrating to be called a ho all day by strangers, and at least in my case, I know that I'm not (I can't and won't speak for anyone else), but still sometimes you just wonder where some people get off. Free speech is one thing, but some folks have some true venom in their veins and need to pray long and hard! So, love her or hate her, I'm just calling it how I see it. Yeah, it's crazy, but that's real. Walk a mile in someone else's shoes and see how you feel...

OK the end of my rant is this. Now TI don't get mad and sue me for jacking, but I want to quote you:

You might've seen me in the video, but n!$#% you dont know me
When you holla when you speak, remember you dont know me
Save all that hatin and that poppin pimpin
Quit tellin people I'm a runner listen you don't know me
Don't be a groupie keep it movin, n*&^% you dont know me
Hey I aint trippin but the truth is really, you dont know me
Yeah you know they call me so fly but you dont know me
You be hatin and I see why, cause you dont know me!!!!

OK that was silly, but hey, a girl's gotta vent!

Peace & Positive Vibes,
Meta

The Boondocks

I am so pumped. The Boondocks is coming to video July 26. I gotta cop that! I love that show. It's too funny. I never let Jordan watch it, but one night I was catching the super late episode, and thought he was in bed. I peeked in his room during a commercial and he wasn't there. I tore the house up looking for him; it was like 3 am. I looking in closets, on the porch, in the basement. This little boy was under my bed watching the Boondocks! The giggle gave it away.

My favorite episodes have to be
1. The Tale of Gangstalicious
2. The Trial of R. Kelly
3. The Itis
4. Guess Hoe's Coming to Dinner

Aaron McGruder is good for some funny ass lines! Some of my favorites are...

Granddad: ...and all I ask y'all to do is act like you got some class!
Riley: [to Huey] Hey...what's "class"?
Huey: It means, "don't act like niggas."
Granddad: Now, now, see? That's what I'm talkin' about right there! We don't use the "n-word" in this house!
Huey: Granddad, you said the word "nigga" 46 times yesterday. I counted!
Granddad: Nigga, hush!

"Tom, did you delete all my MP3s?"
"HeyHeyHey! I'm not going to get anally raped, just so you can listen to Usher."

"You takin her to red lobster wit the chedda biscuits. The fam ain't eatin chedda biscuits, but dis random broad is eatin chedda biscuits"

DuBois: Hey boys! Walks up to them. I can't help but noticing your sign and I hope you boys aren't too upset about me having to prosecute Mr. Kelly.
Huey: Hey man, you do what you gotta do--
Riley (cutting off Huey): Why R. Kelly, huh?! What did R. Kelly do to you?
DuBois: He's accused of relieving himself on an underage girl on tape, which is against the law.
Riley: Okay, okay, okay. But let's examine this whole peeing thing. So I can pee in a toilet, and it's okay, but if I pee on a person, it's like, not okay?
DuBois: Well... umm, yeah.
Riley: Well, what if I'm peeing, and Huey's in the bathroom, and I accidentally pee on Huey? Should I go to jail?
Huey: What the hell would I be doing in the bathroom when you're in the bathroom?
Riley: Hold up, hold up. Remember when we used to sleep in the same bed when we was littler? From time to time I'd have a little "accident".
Huey: You still do.
Riley: Shut up! So, Mr. DuBois, Mr. I-wanna-lock-niggas-up-for-peein, what's the statute of limitations on bedwetting? Why not prosecute me and R. Kelly at the same time, huh?
DuBois: Now Riley, no one's going to prosecute you for bedwetting.
Riley: And you shouldn't. It's a natural bodily function, and now every nigga in the world gonna be scared to pee. I may never pee again!
DuBois: Riley, it was a little girl.
Riley: Oh, I seen that girl. She ain't little. I'm little.
DuBois: Yes.
Riley: Gary Coleman's little.
BuBois: Yeah.
Riley: Mini-me's little.
DuBois: Very.
Riley: And to the best of my knowledge, we ALL managed to avoid gettin peed on so far.
DuBois: But what about the victim?!
Riley: Oh yes, the victim. At what point does personal responsibility become a factor in this equation?
DuBois: I don't think that--
Riley: I see piss coming I move.
D Bois: Hmmm.
Riley: She saw piss coming she stayed.
Du Bois: Yeah she did but--
Riley: And why should I have to miss out on the next R. Kelly album just for that?!
Riley walks off.
Huey (looking at DuBois): Man, you just got beat by an 8-year-old.
Riley (yelling from off-screen): Aaaaand, if R. Kelly goes to jail, I'll piss on your cat!

"What if they have kids? We'll have a brother or sister that's half ho!"

And my alltime favorite...
"Deez niggas is gay. Oh my God! Deez niggas is still kissin!"

What trips me out the most though is that Regina King who does the voices for Huey and Riley does the voice over for Always pads. It makes me feel weird when the commercial comes on. Riley and Huey slanging feminine protection...that ain't right!

Talkin ish!

Nah this post isn't about me! EVERYBODY already knows I talk mad sh*t! This is about Khia. Yes, "My neck, my back" Khia. Multiple mugshot Khia. She did an interview in XXL and she blasts Trina and Jackie O. She says that all the females in hip-hop came out under a dude and that they can't wear a crown because of that. Ok see for yourself...

XXL: A lot of your songs are written from a feminist standpoint. But why do you show more love to male rappers than to female rappers?

Khia: Cause the female rappers are horrible. They just men pleasers, rappin’ off of a piece of paper ‘bout what a man want them to say. A lot of females that are out you can tell they have ghostwriters, ‘cause what they sayin’ is pleasing to a man’s ear. Okay, you gon say, I want a bitch to straight lick the clit and you gon suck me and my homeboy’s dick and I’ma pay you….I don’t represent that. I don’t care what you got, I can get my own. We can’t let me pimp us and dog us [and] act like that shit is cool, ’cause there’s a generation of young ladies looking’ like this like this is how it’s supposed to be.

XXL: Is that why you declined Trina’s offer to collaborate with her?

Khia: Oh yes, Trina, uh, uh. I don’t do her. I feel when you look at Trina, you lookin’ at sex. Most of her fans are men that wanna fuck. Every time you see Trina, she half-naked, or in her video she talking about being a female pimp. At her shows, she’s lap dancing and kissing girls. No female fans don’t wanna see that. She’s catering to what men wanna see. She’s just an entertainer. When I look at her, I just see a whore. I don’t want my daughter being nothing like Trina.


XXL: But what about Jacki-O who claims she’s the Queen of the South?

Khia: Jacki-O ain’t even up for question about being the Queen of the South. Jacki-O sold 60,000 units. She’s bankrupt. Girl, you ain’t even sell 100,000 units. Sit down! She tried to pull a “My Neck, My Back,” but there will only be one. Jacki-O and Trina, every big song they made has needed a feature. I feel I’m the Queen of the South because I’m myself. Don’t get it twisted, Trick Daddy got Trina from Club Rol-lexx [strip club]…You were stripping. Ya clientele went from the Rol-lexx to the industry niggas. You represent Slip and Slide, do you own your mastering? No. Do you own your own publishing? No. ‘Cause you ain’t writing nothing. How can you be a queen when you are being pimped by a bunch of niggas? All of ‘em, Foxy and Jay-Z, Lil’ Kim and Biggie, Shawnna and DTP, Mia X and No Limit. Every big female artists that ever came out, came out under a man. How can you claim to hold the crown like that?

I'm not going to speak on her daughter and what she wants for her. But I'm sure that it isn't to have an album cover filled with all her mugshots! Still I understand that no matter what you're into you always want better for your kids. I just couldn't resist bringing that up!

And I can't begin to trip on someone being half naked because I've never worn too many clothes, and that's not even a sexual thing, I just feel more comfortable with not much on. So I won't go there. It would be the pot calling the kettle black. Plus hell, in Miami the style of dress is so different, even in the workplace, that what is normal there is hoochie in other places. It wouldn't fly in 90% of the rest of the USA but in the bottom it's all good because it's always 90 degrees! The rest of the US is really conservative, and that's what I love about Miami is that it feels European in that folks don't have so many hang ups. But I digress...

As for the lack of power amongst women in hip hop, it's unfortunate, but KHIA TOLD THE TRUTH! Name 3 female rappers right now with songs on the charts. You can't. Kim was locked up, Foxy was recuperating from surgery, Trina is MIA. Does Missy even rap?

Most females who rap are a part of a crew and they get pushed to the back for the men in the crew. We have to wait and wait and wait for them to drop while we hear from every person with a penis in the posse. And the lyrics women spit are really overtly sexual and not about much. But that's most of hip-hop right now. Is anyone rapping about anything? And what does that say for society? I mean what is really going on? Are we all that empty and shallow? (YES! The world is jacked up!)

What's happening with my beloved hip hop? Can a sister get some real love? Where are the women in hip hop? And our absence isn't just about us not loving ourselves, because there are Jean Grey's and Bahamadia's and countless females on the underground and trying to break out who aren't all sex, and some who are sexy and substantive, but no one seems to want to hear them. Or is it that no one wants to sign them? No labels push them. Women do have it harder.

For example, I've gotten criticism already for the modeling pics on my site. Yeah I was half naked. And? I looked good. Do y'all know how old I am?! How old I was on those pics? I'm holding it together and I'm proud to still be fit. And every former model has her pics on her site. Let me tell you, those pictures are what drive the traffic to and through my site. I've tried the site with them and without them, revamped a million times, and frankly the pictures drive traffic through the rest of the site (I'm all in my Urchin stats, analyzing every day). I've got mixed emotions about that at times, but it is what it is. Business. I want to SELL books not just write them. If no one knows who I am, who's gonna buy the book? The criticism doesn't bother me, I just don't understand it. It's like, I used to model, that was my job. My pics are my resume! Get over it already.

I see that with hip hop. Men want to see pretty or sexy women, and men drive the industry. The female rappers Khia mentions cater to men who buy records. But women do like them.

So does a woman have to choose between being sexy and smart or talented? I say HELL NO! That's what I was exploring with my novel...Dez is fine AND she has talent, but what really gets her noticed? Her looks. Even when she isn't even trying. So she figures why fight it?

I sure hope that a woman is able to money up and start a label. Maybe it will be me. I would just love to see what a female mogul could acheive. Hmmm...

And in the same vein, why is it that Mary J. Blige's alter ego Brooklyn is my favorite rapper? It's a sad day in hip hop.

FEMALE RAPPERS OUT THERE, STAND UP!!! I CAN'T SEE YOU! SPEAK UP! I CAN'T HEAR YOU!

and i miss u!

MIAMI WINS IT!!!!

I may have been sick that Phoenix got knocked out the box, but I'm too ecstatic that the Heat won. 4 games in a row. D Wade is awesome, but what else would you expect from the Chi?

MIAMI!!!!!!!!!!!! It's that Heat that Heat that Heat!




Music Video Codes

So sick!

I am so sick that the Phoenix Suns didn't make it to the play offs. I've been in denial a few days about their loss. Our loss. I don't think that you all understand how much I love the Phoenix Suns. They have the cutest team in the league. Three fine, foreign black men and a cute white guy. Mmm mmm good.

I LOVE Raja Bell because he hates Kobe as much as I do. And he's from St. Croix, and when you read The Rolexxx Club, you'll know that I have a special place in my heart for sexy men from the Virgin Islands. Found out he was married. Crushed!

I LOVE Leandro Barbosa. He's from Brazil. Brazilian men are so sexy. All I know how to say in Portuguese is Obrigado, which means thank you. But I can think of lots of situation that would cause me to tell Leandro Obrigado over and over again.

I LOVE Boris Diaw. Je ne parles pas francais, but I love to hear it spoken. I met this African guy once from Senegal. He lived in Paris and spoke fluent French. He had on a tailored suit and looked so clean and refined and elegant. I hate 9-5 guys, but I love a sharp dressed man. A man in a jersey or white tee does nothing for me! I had already picked out the china pattern and planned my life in Paris, but on our first date he got pissy drunk and pissed on a tree right on Rush Street, where the rich people of Chicago play. What a turn off. Plus he tried to play that I don't speak English shit, but he spoke it just fine when he became an octopus and I had to fight him off. Please let me kiss you. Please let me feel you. Not after you peed on a tree in public player. Such a let down. But back to the topic, I'm sure Boris is a perfect gentleman.

I really like Steve Nash, but he's short and I want to wash and condition his hair and blow it dry with a round brush. I don't want to sleep with him. Really now, must his hair always look so stringy? But aside from him being cute, I actually respect him as an athlete. Dude personifies the words hustle and fast break.

Amare Stoudemire is so cute and he is a really sweet person. I met him his rookie year, and we exchanged numbers, and talked once. But when he realized that I'm ALMOST old enough to be his mama, he lost interest. Maybe that's not why, but it's all I could think of. I still like him though, I just wish he'd stop getting hurt! But hell, I'm sure he does too!

Shawn Marion hangs out a lot in Chicago, but he's not my type at all and I think he's married. No interest, but he's a good player.

Yes I know that cute players are not what basketball is all about, but that's about the gist of it for me. I don't get anything if they win so they may as well look hot if I'm going to sit and watch a game. I mean really, Phoenix is so cute! Compare them to Detroit's team. Good lawd, I don't want to meet any of the Pistons. They look like they'd mug me or something. Scary.

So all that to say GO HEAT! I do love Miami, after all it is my home away from home. But they aren't as cute as my boys from AZ. I was really looking forward to a Miami and Phoenix showdown, but oh well. Come Thursday, it's all about the M-I-yayo.