A Perfect Day

I took the shorty to a cookout today at Hayes Park by the lake. The cookout was for a dude I kind of used to kick it with, who looked good as ever and is doing his thing in NY. He and a bunch of other Kappas were there. There wasn't a cloud in sight. Not too much humidity. It was truly the perfect day.

There I was surrounded by beautiful Black men, all gainfully employed and in shape and funny, witty, entertaining guys. And I got my share of attention which I always love. But more than a few had on silver rings. Now for those of you wondering, so what, let me explain the silver rings to you.

A lot of men wear silver rings of all kinds. The ones I speak of usually have a design on them, I forget what it's called, but kind of like part of a Versace print. I've seen it on various fingers, but often the left hand, second finger, or the right hand second finger. Being a writer and observing other people all the time, I couldn't help but wonder one day, "gee, why does every gay man I know wear one of those rings?" I have a lot of gay male friends and so I asked about the significance of the rings.

A few held out on me and said "nothing". One said it was just a symbol of freedom of expression. Huh? One said, "it's a gay thing" and left it at that. Now every man who dons a silver ring is not gay. I know this. But a lot of men who are do. And with me being admittedly paranoid about unknowingly falling in love with a brother on the "down low", it makes me wonder when I see a handsome, successful single man with one on. Hey, old boy Jonathan got over on Terry McMillan, and Al Reynolds I suspect is getting over on Star Jones. I'd hate to be played for a fool like that. So yes, I am paranoid, because despite what some think, you can't always tell what someone likes to do in the bedroom by their mannerisms or the company they keep.

But still I wonder. Especially when a man is kind of slutty, because I wonder is he trying to cover something with his womanizing? It's like, who are you trying to fool and what are you trying to prove.

It's a shame now that I constantly question someone's sexual orientation. But if I'm considering kicking it with someone, or they pique my interest, I have to, because so many men LIE about being bi-sexual. But let me make it clear. I'm not going to make a moral judgement on anyone ONLY based on who they screw. I don't make character judgements based on my curiosity either, UNLESS you intentionally lie to and manipulate the romantic feelings of others to selfishly cover what you don't have the courage to be. Gay, straight, or other has no bearing on a person's personality, unless they LIE CONSTANTLY and hurt others. So people out there, have the courage to be gay if you're gay. Everything has it's price so be willing to pay it, because straight folks pay a price on being straight. People question and judge our behavior too. Join the club. Just don't be a LIAR.

But I wonder, would I get the shock of my life if everyone told the truth about their orientation. What would happen if I woke up one morning with the ability to see the deal. Like a real Gaydar. I'm sure I would.

But all that aside, it really was a perfect day. Especially since my curiosity was simply that; I had no romantic interest in anyone there. But I'll admit, one guy was exceptionally hot. The food was excellent, and my son had a ball playing with the other kids. I had a perfect buzz, not too tipsy, not too sober. Yes mommy's can drink too. But it was a mother appropriate buzz.

I miss the good old days when there were more events like this.